


The Fastest Pedal Car in the World

by Tadpole4176



Category: Top Gear (UK) RPF
Genre: Adventure, Friendship, Gen, Kidfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-16
Updated: 2020-02-16
Packaged: 2021-02-27 23:02:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,090
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22753681
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tadpole4176/pseuds/Tadpole4176
Summary: In primary  school together, Jeremy, James and Stig have built themselves a racing pedal car, but in order to enter the race they need another driver....Naturally, the whole thing goes completely wrong, and they end up on an epic pedal car journey across Yorkshire.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 11
Collections: Kidfic Headquarter





	The Fastest Pedal Car in the World

James folded his arms, glaring at the great oaf and Stiggy, not caring that they were both important, rule the school, year 6s and he was a mere year 5. This was too important for that.

“I’m telling you, Jezza, we have to have a 4 person team, we can’t just go twice and pretend.”

“Why not?” protested Jeremy, nodding at their silent friend, who even now, in May, was wearing a full face balaclava. And sunglasses. “It’s not like anyone knows what Stiggy looks like.”

Stig didn’t respond, but his crossed arms, combined with a tilt of his head, got the message across loud and clear.

“Fine,” conceded Jeremy, “I’ll ask around for volunteers at school.”

“You’ve already done that twice,” put in James, “no one else in year 5 or 6 is interested.”

“Year 4 then, would that please you, James?”

“I’m ecstatic,” nodded James, his arms remaining folded, but an eyebrow raised to join them. Really, the chances of anyone following that great lug anywhere, never mind to a race in a home made pedal car, seemed miniscule.

Still, with Jez gone, he turned his attention back to the car itself, taking a moment to reach for a cloth and carefully wipe away a small spot of grease on the steering wheel. Stig gave him a silent thumbs up, then carefully climbed into the driver’s seat, adjusting the cushions as James carefully removed their optional extra, a passenger seat.

Well, they weren’t supposed to have a passenger seat, but on the other hand, the race was a whole lot shorter than the time they had to play with it at home.

*********

Race day dawned bright and sunny, and early – with the trip to Wombwell expected to take a few hours. The boys had been told to arrive at school for a painful 5am in order to load the school minibus and meet Mr Fisher, the history teacher, who seemed very interested in pedal car racing, but perhaps not all that concerned about how their school’s very first team got on. It didn’t matter, it was a ride. They didn’t need any extra help.

Within minutes of getting the keys, the three boys were busy removing the rear seats in the minibus, and once the pedal car had been lifted in, they climbed into the remaining seats. Ready to go.

Almost.

“Right, are we good to go?” called Mr Fisher, cheerfully.

“Err,” said Jeremy.

“Jez?” asked James, giving the older boy a sideways look.

“You were the one who said we needed a fourth.”

Behind Jeremy, Stiggy nodded precisely once.

“You have one?” asked James.

“I do.”

“Who?”

“Well…”

“Jez?” James raised his eyebrow.

“Fine, I’m not sure, OK. One of the year 4 girls told me that this kid was really keen, and so I got a message to him. He said he’d have to sneak out though, so…”

“OK, OK,” James held his hands up. “If he turns up, I’ll be impressed you found anyone, I promise.”

“He’ll be here!” Jeremy peered out of the window into the early morning sun, praying for a sign, any sign, to prove him right. Then, just as James was about to insist that they leave (in order to give them plenty of time to follow a perfectly adequate satnav to their destination, apparently), there was a rustling in the bushes behind them, and a small boy tumbled out of them, still dressed in pyjamas and with various pieces of twig and dust covering his body.

He rushed over to the minibus and pulled at the door handle, entirely failing to open the door. Stig reached over from the inside and yanked it towards him, temporarily unbalancing the smaller boy.

“Hi,” he said, beaming at the 4 occupants of the bus. “Sorry I’m late, I had a bit of trouble with my window. I’m Richard Hammond.”

“Hi,” said Jeremy, temporarily lost for words.

“James,” said James.

“Right, I think that’s everyone, so if you could pull that door shut and we’ll be off. Richard, grab a seat,” put in Mr Fisher, watching as Stiggy closed the door, then turning to put his seatbelt on in the front.

Jeremy found his voice. “You cannot possibly be a year 4.”

“I can!” protested Richard. “I’m nearly 9.”

James, taking in the sight of the huge year 6, with his enormous curly hair, who at 11 was taller than most of the teachers, and then the smallest 8 year old he’d ever seen, began to laugh. “Only you, Jez,” he chuckled.

“But you’re tiny!” exclaimed Jeremy. “My pet hamster is bigger than you!”

“Is not!” protested Richard, ignoring James’s giggles.

“Don’t worry about it, Hamster,” grinned James. “It’ll be fine.”

Stiggy silently reached out and patted Richard on the head, making the younger boy jump.

“That’s all sorted then,” smiled Jeremy smugly, briefly sticking his tongue out at James. “Told you I could find someone.”

“Half a person anyway,” whispered James.

*********

Finally, finally, they arrived at Wombwell, blending into the hordes of vans and assorted trailers and even roofracks carrying lightweight pedal cars, suitable for the under twelves race. Once they’d parked up, Mr Fisher headed off to find out where they were supposed to be, then once he’d helped them unload their car, disappeared into the crowd, only pausing to remind Richard that getting dressed would be a good idea.

The four boys looked at each other, momentarily silent.

“I can’t believe we’re here!” shouted Richard, bouncing up and down on his toes, which still didn’t make him look any bigger.

“I’m going to drive it to the line-up,” announced Jeremy, flinging the car’s cushions out at James and squeezing into the driver’s seat. Slowly, he navigated through the throngs of people.

“Wow, just wow, look at that Stiggy!” exclaimed Richard, gesturing to a sleek, black pedal car covered in green writing and sponsorship stickers. “That’s the one that won two years ago.”

“Really?” asked James. “Have you been looking into this?”

“Oh yes, as soon as I knew the school had a team, I wanted to know more about it. Who’d won, how to race, any tactics,” Richard grinned. “Some of the write ups made it sound like a lot of fun, and just a little bit scary.”

“Yeah,” grinned James, conceding to himself, that whilst Richard looked completely unsuitable, at least they were talking the same language. “I’m looking forward to trying the car out properly.”

“You haven’t yet?”

“Well, round school we have, but there’s nothing like having a proper track to go round.”

“Yeah,” Richard turned to peer towards the track again, though for the moment his view was obstructed by the hoards of people milling around the inspection line up.

“Come on,” said James. “Plenty of time for daydreaming about the track later, now we’ve got to go and keep an eye on Jeremy, make sure he doesn’t break anything or upset anyone.”

*********

Waiting for the inspection was nerve-wracking. The inspectors, two men and a woman, could be seen working their way along the line of nervous competitors, slowly getting closer to the complete novices like them. Never once, even when inspecting the cars of experienced competitors, previous winners and the like, did James see any one of them even crack a smile, and the slightest deviance from the rules meant it didn’t matter how far you’d travelled, you were out.

Perhaps inevitably, the inspection didn’t go well.

Jeremy, of course, didn’t help matters. In any situation, his approach was to yell at it, or make ridiculous jokes, until it went away. But these weren’t joking people, and they didn’t like being yelled at. Not that, in the end, that made any difference.

“We need to see each of the drivers sitting in the driver’s seat for the inspection,” they’d been told, carefully watching James and Stiggy demonstrate the cars seating. Then they saw Jeremy.

“The fairing isn’t going to adequately protect him should the car roll,” one of them had said.

Then they saw Richard.

“The fairing is obscuring his view, and there are more than the permitted number of cushions in the driver’s seat,” they’d said.

Then Jeremy had yelled something unrepeatable, and the inspectors had been cross.

“I guess we don’t get to ride it round the track then?” said Richard sadly.

James shrugged, thrusting his hands into his pockets and staring miserably at the car. “No,” he agreed.

“I refuse to accept defeat,” announced Jeremy. “James, fetch the passenger seat, we’ll show them.”

“Jezza?” asked James, a bit worried.

Stiggy shook his head, just once, and disappeared into the crowd.

“Go on, we can’t leave without doing anything!”

“Fine,” grumbled James, heading back to the minibus to find the extra seat. “Come on, Hamster.”

“What’s happening?” asked Richard, bouncing along besides James, despite their disappointment.

“I suspect we’re about to get into pointless trouble,” said James dryly.

Richard shrugged. “I snook out of the window at 5am, too late to worry about trouble.”

“Strewth,” commented James, shaking his head.

Back at the car, the passenger seat slid on easily, bolting in place, and providing an extra boy space to ride on the car, albeit without helping to pedal. It also provided a small, flat section on the top of the car, which James quickly directed Richard to.

“Here, you sit on top there, Jezza can drive – for now – and I’ll take the passenger seat. Let’s see where trouble takes us. By which I mean Jez, because he’s always trouble.”

“Yes!” exclaimed Jeremy, ignoring James’s comment, “Let’s go!”

Before any of the officials could anticipate it, Jeremy, James and Richard had their pedal car on the track, Jeremy’s long legs quickly getting the little car up to speed, despite the extra weight, and eliciting cries of joy from all three of them, even as James spotted one of the inspectors leaping over the track fence and chasing after them.

“He looks quite cross, Jez,” he commented.

“And so he should be,” nodded Jez. “Everyone hold on, I’m going to lose him.”

Unexpectedly, veering away from the track through a small gap in the fence and onto a deserted side road, Jeremy began to gain speed as they started to head downhill, his feet now whirring round faster than he could realistically pedal.

“Speeeeeeedddd!”

“Aaaaaaaahhhhhh,” yelled Richard, beaming from ear to ear.

“Oh, cock!” yelled James, “Clarkson, are you trying to kill us?”

The pedal car continued to pick up speed, careening down the tiny back road, with only Jeremy’s feet to act as brakes and barely enough steering to handle the corners. Still, Jeremy managed to maintain a semblance of control, flicking the wheels just enough to make the corners without tipping them all onto the ground. It was incredibly exhilarating. The wind rushed through their hair, the little car was practically bouncing around the corners, and Richard needed to wrap his arms round Jeremy’s head in order to stay on.

Then, their luck ran out. As they hurtled round one last corner, they were faced with a flock of sheep in the road. Jeremy swung the car further left, praying that the open gate at the side of the road led to something that might provide a soft landing. The little car obeyed, leaping into a field, still going way too fast, but now adding rough terrain into the mix. Richard tightened his grip, causing Jeremy to lift one hand from the steering wheel in order to move one scrawny arm far enough that he could breathe, similarly, James twisted round from the back, gripping Richard round the waist.

“Watch where you’re going, you pillock, we’re going to crash!”

“Hamster, let go, I can’t see!”

“I’m going to fall off!”

“I’ve got you,” shouted James, grabbing both Richard and Jeremy in an effort to help them all stay on board, “Now Jezza, steer!”

Too late. The car careened into a small bank, then it was airborne, the three boys clinging to each other as they flew, Richard and James both with their eyes screwed tightly shut.

Then, abruptly, it was all over.

“We are the luckiest bastards in history,” gasped Jeremy, leaning his head back far enough that he knocked Richard from the top of the car and into a loose pile of hay.

“Good landing, thanks,” muttered Richard as he flopped back into the hay.

James, left at the back of the car, carefully placed his feet on the ground and concentrated on breathing deeply, trying to get his adrenaline under control. He was still gazing at his feet and taking huge gulps of air when there was a loud clatter to his left.

“What the…?”

“Wasn’t me,” put in Jeremy, lifting his hands from the steering wheel.

From his position on the floor in the hay, Richard slowly sat up. “Guys? I think the floor’s moving.”

“Cock,” said James.

*********

A quick search revealed that their soft landing was, in fact, a huge pile of hay inside a train wagon, one that on their arrival had been parked in some sort of small yard, but was now steadily heading away, already too fast for any of them to jump.

“What’re we going to do?” gasped Richard. “How are we going to get back?”

James glanced over at Jeremy, searching for any sign of one of his bright ideas, before responding slowly. “I have no idea, but we’ll sort it, it’ll be fine.”

A moment later, Jeremy grinned. “Of course it’ll be fine. We have transport,” he gestured to the – largely intact - pedal car, which he’d finally extracted himself from, “and enough funds to get us food.” He reached into his pockets, pulling out a selection of pound coins, some small change, and finally a crisp £5. “My Mum thought I might need to buy food at the race.”

“Me too,” agreed James, pulling a superhero wallet from his pocket and revealing another £5 note.

“Oh,” said Richard. “I just grabbed some food from the cupboards. I thought I’d get in more trouble for taking money. But the food’s in my bag.”

Which, of course, was still in the minibus. Miles away.

Jeremy drew himself to his full height, staring down at the much smaller body of Richard deliberately. “I think we can probably cover the amount you’re going to eat.”

It was an hour or more before the train finally stopped, pausing at a station long enough for the three boys to extract themselves and, slightly less elegantly, the pedal car clattered onto the platform.

A guard, who obviously wasn’t expecting anyone to disembark from a goods train, did a double take as they landed, but clearly chose to ignore them, and so the three of them ended up stood outside the station, ready to begin their epic journey home.

“Settle,” read Richard, gazing at the station sign, completely baffled as to their location.

Jeremy nodded knowingly, “I’ve heard of that. I think we’ve gone north a bit. Here,” he indicated the train map, “this’ll do.”

“There,” said James, pointing, “Lancaster. I have an Aunt there.”

“OK, doesn’t look too far,” shrugged Richard.

“Lancaster,” nodded Jeremy.

“Don’t we need a compass or a map or something?” asked James.

“You think buying a map is more important than buying food?” asked Jeremy.

“We can make a compass out of a needle and some water,” offered Richard eagerly. “Except, I don’t have a needle.”

Jeremy snorted, an aborted laugh, then took charge, climbing back into the driver’s seat of the pedal car. “We don’t need a compass, I can remember where we’re going. Climb on.”

“Jeremy,” said James, “this time no driving like a yobbo. We want to arrive in just one piece.”

“What, like all of us stuck together?” asked Richard, giggling. “I don’t think I’d like that.”

“I’ll have you know I’m the perfect driver,” put in Jeremy. “Did I, or did I not, provide us with the perfect landing earlier.”

“Accident,” coughed James, under his breath.

Jeremy glared, but began to pedal, slowly departing the station and heading west, into the suburbs – such as they were – of Settle.

It didn’t take too long to pass by the houses round Settle and finally find themselves on another country road, blissfully car free and thankfully still warm and reasonably sunny. For a few, glorious minutes James began to actually enjoy the ride, listening to the birds, watching hedges drift by - albeit quite slowly. Then, abruptly, as the road began to gently incline, Jeremy stopped.

“I’m dying,” he announced, gasping for breath. “Someone else is going to have to drive.”

“I’ll do it,” offered Richard, sliding down from his perch and eagerly waiting by the driver’s seat.

“Right,” agreed Jeremy, climbing out and moving out of the way.

It was tricky, getting Richard far enough forward to read the pedals. The cushions intended for the purpose had been abandoned at the race track, so it took pretty much every item of clothing the three boys owned, including Jeremy’s shoes, to push him forwards far enough. By the time he was ready, each of them was only wearing a pair of shorts.

“It’d better not get any colder,” grumbled James.

“You can always run along behind,” offered Jeremy, “That’ll keep you warm.”

“Ha ha,” responded James. “Go on, Hamster.”

Richard pushed his foot down on the pedal and slowly, ever so slowly, the car inched forward. “Wow, you guys are really heavy,” he muttered, pushing his foot down again, trying to get the car moving properly.

“James, I think you’re really going to have to run behind,” said Jeremy, laughing.

“Why me?”

“Because I’ve just been driving, I need a break,” pointed out the larger boy, confidently.

“Right,” sighed James, sliding from the car. “I might need my shoes back though.”

“Oh yeah,” grinned Richard, sheepishly, finding them from behind his back and throwing them in James’s direction, before struggling to place his feet back on the pedals.

“Onwards, Hamster,” cried Jeremy, pointing down the road.

“OK,” huffed Richard, pushing once more at the pedals. James, with a degree of sympathy for the much smaller boy, walked to the back of the car and placing his hands on it, began to push.

Finally, the car began to genuinely move.

“Yes! Power!” shouted Jeremy, sprawling back in the passenger seat.

*********

“Stop! Hamster! Stop!” called James, running after the pedal car as it trundled down a hill, approaching a major road far too quickly, Jeremy still lounging about on the passenger seat, despite the effort of keeping his feet off the floor.

“I can’t stop iiiiiitttt!” yelled Richard, sounding distinctly panicked.

“Jezza, put your feet down,” shouted James, still chasing after them.

“I can’t, I don’t have my shoes on!” objected Jeremy, nonetheless reaching into the driver’s seat for his shoes.

“You’re going to get crushed, you imbeciles!” responded James, frantically waving his arms at Jeremy, as he watched the speeding traffic on the road crossing ahead.

“Too much pressure,” muttered Jeremy, finally getting his shoes on and placing his feet on the ground.

It didn’t stop the car, though Jeremy suspected his Mum was going to have something to say about the state of his shoes when he got home. It didn’t even slow the car down much, so as a grass verge loomed at the side of the road, he grabbed Richard, planted his feet on the ground, and dived to the ground.

Richard slid free of the car surprisingly easily, and the car hurtled away alone, free-wheeling rapidly across the busy main road even as the two boys rolled to a halt in the grass, Jeremy trying to avoid landing too heavily on Richard. As James caught up with them, they both lay panting in the grass, unable to say anything as they took in the nearness of their escape.

“That was close,” commented James, over the sound of breathing.

“I’m never letting him drive again,” wheezed Jeremy.

Richard opened his mouth to protest, then let the words die on his lips, aware that he hadn’t even seen the road coming. “We could have died,” he whispered instead.

James hauled them both up. “Come on, we’ve got to keep going.”

For several moments, the three of them stood at the side of the road, staring at the hedge opposite, where the car seemed to have landed, apparently unmolested by any traffic. Finally, there was a gap in the oncoming vehicles, and as one, mainly because James had grabbed each of the others by the arm, they ran across the road.

“Is it OK?” asked Richard, running his hand along the back of the car as though he was stroking it.

“Just let me take a look at the damage,” muttered James. “If you two could maybe move out of the way,” he suggested.

“I can help?” offered Richard.

“No, come on Hamster,” said Jeremy, pulling at the younger boy’s arm, “He doesn’t like other people helping with his precious machine. Look, there’s a shop over there, let’s get some provisions.”

Richard glanced up, noting that there was in fact a small, brightly lit shop at the side of the busy road, his stomach rumbling as he noticed it. “Good plan,” he grinned.

The shop was much like the sort of shop found at a petrol station, although admittedly with much fancier brickwork. It clearly served road users as a kind of tiny service station before they disappeared off into the wilderness Richard knew even the train map had suggested. Roughly twenty miles of nothing but farms and tiny villages. “We’ll have to do a good job here, Jez,” he said quietly, “We’ve got a long way to go and I don’t think there’ll be many shops.”

“Don’t worry, Hamster, I know what I’m doing,” bellowed Jeremy confidently, surveying the meagre offerings. “We need drink,” he announced, “And food. I think pies would be good. And sweets – they’ve got lots of energy.”

“I thought fruit was better?” put in Richard. “When Mrs Jones talks about healthy eating, she always mentions fruit.”

“Healthy eating is just for geeks and fitness freaks,” declared Jeremy, peering down at Richard. “It’s no good for long distance pedal car-ing.”

“Right.” Richard glanced up at Jeremy, wondering if he was serious, then decided he was quite fond of sweets so he might as well go along with it. “OK. And drink?”

Jeremy marched over to the fizzy drinks, grabbing a 2 litre bottle of the shop’s own lemonade with a flourish then marching to the counter with his purchases. Moments later, they were back at the car, annoying James.

“I’ve got you a pie, James,” announced Jeremy.

“Thank you, Jeremy,” grunted James. “Perhaps you and the other annoying thing could stand out of my way and eat while I finish fixing this.”

“What’s wrong with it?” asked Richard, ignoring the grumpiness.

“Just some loose screws in the pedals, bit of a dent in the nose. Nothing too serious, at least it wouldn’t be if I had my proper toolkit with me. Now go away, I’m mending stuff.”

“I’m good with fiddly bits,” offered Richard again.

“Jezza! Will you get this tiny muppet out of my way!”

Jeremy, apparently well trained in the art of not annoying James more than he intended to, promptly appeared and grabbed Richard by the scruff of the neck, giving him no choice but to follow along. “Ignore him,” he added, by way of explanation. “He just needs everything done exactly the right way. Even the chess club annoy him by playing chess wrongly.”

“They do play the wrong rules!”

“See,” said Jeremy, thrusting a pie at Richard. “Come on, if we eat fast enough we can steal some of the sweets I bought for James.”

*********

It was nearly dark by the time James had the pedals repaired to his satisfaction. In an ideal world they should probably have found somewhere to sleep and gone to bed, but somehow it didn’t seem likely they could get even one room with the remaining £5, so stopping didn’t seem all that tempting. Instead, the three of them squeezed back onto the pedal car and, illuminated by the tiny torch on Jeremy’s keyring, they headed off down the nearest country lane.

This time, there was no talking. James took the pedals, getting the little car going smoothly, whilst Richard balanced back on the roof and Jeremy took the passenger seat. Doggedly, up and down hill (provided they weren’t too big), James kept going. He only, finally, stopped when Jeremy poked him on the shoulder.

“James? Oy, James!”

“What?” James didn’t sound overly patient.

“Hamster’s asleep, he keeps falling on me. It’s getting annoying.”

“So? It’s not making us any slower, quit whining”

“Can we leave him behind?”

“No, just suck it up, man. Hold him in place and let me get on with pedalling.”

“James?”

“Yes,” snapped James.

“He keeps trying to fall off.”

Finally, James stopped. “Jezza,” he began. “If you don’t stop whinging about this one minor inconvenience, I’m going to commit murder. And no one will ever find out, because we’re in the middle of nowhere.”

James climbed out, reaching over Jeremy’s head and causing him to wince instinctively. Instead of attacking Jeremy, however, he grabbed Richard and hauled him over Jeremy’s shoulder onto his lap.

“There,” he said, “Now he’s easy to hold on to.”

“James?”

“No, Jez. We are not stopping now, and we are not leaving him behind.”

James climbed back into the driver’s seat and the car slowly began to move again. It was nearly an hour later when, finally, they found another village and James conceded that it might be a good idea to stop.

“Finally,” grumbled Jeremy, plonking his feet on the ground with a heavy sigh. “Hamster snores.”

“I’m not sure it helps, Jezza. You’re right we need to stop, but how?”

“I have a plan,” he responded, hitting James with his most mournful face.

“You look like a sulking teenager, there’s just no way anyone’s letting you in their house with that.”

“What do you suggest then?”

“Gotta make use of what you’ve got,” smiled James, nodding at the still sleeping Richard.

“What?”

“Come on, all we need to do is work out which one of these cars belongs to an old lady, then knock on her door and look suitably pathetic. He is doing a particularly good job of looking pathetic. Even better if you pick him up.”

Jeremy pulled a face. “That really works on old ladies?”

“Definitely,” said James, authoritatively. “My Aunt falls for it all the time.”

“OK then, old lady car.” Jeremy scanned their surroundings, the single occupied street that seemed to make up the village of Keasden.

“I’ve found it,” he added, moments later. “That car is a brown Volvo, there is no way that anyone who isn’t nearly dead would be caught driving that.”

“You might want to let me do the talking,” suggested James. “You pick up the midget. Come on. And don’t pull the sulky face, it’s very off-putting.” He led the older boy to past the brown Volvo and to the neatly presented front door. “And don’t tread on any flowers,” he added under his breath.

“James, I can’t even see my feet with this lump in the way.”

“Don’t be ridiculous man, he’s titchy, he can’t possibly be that in the way. Now be quiet, I’ve got some old lady charming to do.”

Jeremy let out a cough that sounded suspiciously like a giggle and caused Richard to stir for the first time in the whole proceedings, then James reached out to knock on the door.

“Hello?”

James tried to ignore Jeremy’s tiny shout of triumph as a (relatively) elderly lady opened the door. Well, she had grey hair. She seemed pretty sprightly though.

“Hello,” replied James, in his best polite grown up voice.

“Are you all right?” she asked, her eyes clearly drawn to the comatose Richard.

“Well, that’s quite a long story,” said James, kicking Jeremy as he opened his mouth to say something. “But we wondered if we could trouble you for a bit of floor space for a few hours?”

“Are you lost?” she frowned. “Or hurt?”

“No, no, nothing like that. We’re just tired and we’ve not got enough money to stay anywhere,” admitted James. “And my little brother’s fallen asleep.”

“Does the big brother not speak?” she glanced suspiciously at Jeremy.

“I do,” said Jeremy, “but most grown-ups like him better.”

“Can’t imagine why,” added James, leaning back against Jeremy and patting his shoulder in what he hoped appeared to be a friendly manner.

The lady sighed, “You’d better come in then,” she conceded wryly, stepping back to allow them room to enter – directly into the front room. “I’ll grab you some blankets.”

Heaving a sigh of relief, Jeremy dropped Richard onto the sofa, then collapsed onto the floor himself, almost asleep as soon as he stopped standing. “I hope you don’t snore, James,” he muttered, his eyes already shut.

By the time the old lady returned to the front room, all three boys were fast asleep, the two older ones sprawled across the floor. Smiling, more convinced now that she could see their weariness, she gently laid the blankets across them and headed off to bed herself.

*********

Richard came round slowly, initially disturbed by the chainsaw-like noise of James snoring, and then the intense beam of sunlight that seemed to be aiming directly at his head through the curtains. He blinked in puzzlement, wondering at first if there was something wrong with his eyes as he found himself surrounded by strange ornaments and a lot of beige. But then he could see James and Jeremy just fine, so he was probably OK.

“Morning sweetie,” said a strange old lady.

Richard flinched, not expecting anyone to speak to him.

“Did you sleep OK?”

A little dumbstruck, Richard nodded.

“Let’s let your brothers sleep for a little while longer, shall we?”

“My…? Yes,” said Richard, catching himself in time. “Who are you? Have I met you before?”

“I’m Millie,” she replied, smiling as he clambered off the sofa over the arm, avoiding the two boys on the floor.

“I’m Richard,” he replied, because really he had to say something. “Where am I? How did I get here?”

Millie laughed, “Come on, I’ll get you a drink and I’ll explain how the three of you ended up in my living room.”

“Excellent,” said Richard, following after her obediently. Soon he was swinging his legs from a high kitchen stool and sipping at an amazing hot chocolate, listening intently to Millie’s story of how she’d come to adopt some stray children for the night.

He tried very hard not to blush at the bit where Jeremy had carried him, and vowed never to speak to either of the other two boys about that.

“Richard?” a voice came from the other room.

“Right here,” Richard poked his face round the door, grinning at the bleary face of Jeremy, and the still slumbering James.

“Ah,” Jeremy nodded, turning his attention to James and pulling faces as he snored and causing Richard to giggle.

*********

It was after 10 before the trio set off once more, Jeremy squeezing back into the driver’s seat and James taking his place at the back. The sun was still shining above them, and the breakfast in their bellies made all three of them feel much more able to handle anything the road might throw at them. Nonetheless, it was only two hours later when hunger began to set in again.

Only this time, there was nothing edible to be seen.

Jeremy, generously he felt, shared out the last of the sweets, and for a little while that helped, but really they needed something else to eat.

“I wish I was a cow,” grumbled Jeremy.

“Why?” asked James.

“Because then I could eat grass.”

“And nothing else,” pointed out Richard. “It might get a bit dull.”

“But I’m going to die of hunnnngggggeeerrr.”

“Wait,” said Richard, “I think I see something.”

“Is it a three course meal? Or a pie?”

“Apple tree!” shrieked Richard. “So no, but pretty good in the circumstances. Over there.” He tapped Jeremy on the shoulder and pointed down a road to his right.

“I like apples,” agreed Jeremy, turning sharply enough that Richard had to grab James’s shoulder to remain on the car’s roof.

“Me too,” agreed James, eyeing the apple tree enthusiastically and licking his lips.

Jeremy braked, pulling to a halt perfectly beneath the apple tree, which turned out to be a bit taller than he’d really been expecting.

“Oh,” he declared, looking at James and Richard as he held his arms above his head – scraping a few lower branches, but nowhere near reaching even the lowest apple.

“Indeed,” nodded James gravely, glancing to the car and adding, “do not stand on the car, the roof will most definitely will not take your weight.”

“Right.” Jeremy hunched his shoulders, revealing that that’s exactly what he was thinking.

Richard looked thoughtful. “If you could get me up to those branches, I think that looks climbable.”

“Aha,” said James.

Jeremy pouted for a moment. “You want me to pick you up again, don’t you.”

“Well, yes,” said Richard, “If you don’t mind.”

James thumped Jeremy on the arm, “Don’t be ridiculous man, he can’t weigh any more than that dog you’ve got at home. You’re picking that up all the time!”

“Okay,” said Jeremy, still looking very put upon. “Come here.” He nodded to Richard, holding his hands out as a means of boosting Richard up, and waiting for Richard to put his hands on his shoulders.

“Ready?”

Richard blinked, a momentary flash of nervousness appearing, before the typical grin re-instated itself. “Ready.”

It wasn’t graceful, but quickly Richard launched towards the tree, grabbing hold of the first branch he could for dear life, and swinging a leg over it to steady himself. James, who’d been holding his breath, let out a big sigh of relief, and a few moments later, when he took a large bite of a juicy, red apple, James too was smiling broadly.

In the end, climbing the tree was simple enough. There were enough apples within sensible reach of the middle that Richard didn’t need to shuffle down any of the smaller branches, and the inner branches were close enough together that he could move around easily. He efficiently collected 6 apples, lobbing the first ones down immediately, and shoving the others into his pockets, and even the hood of his sweater, before finally bending a single branch down far enough that Jeremy could pluck the final apple.

“There you go, little fella,” he called, giggling in spite of himself.

Jeremy glared for a moment, then burst out laughing, bending over almost double as he did so. “Pillock,” he wheezed.

“Have you two quite finished?” prodded James, his apple finished and the core carefully deposited in a hedge. “We should really get going again.”

“Yes, boss,” muttered Jeremy, glancing at Richard with a wink now that he’d realised he had a partner in crime.

“Aye, aye, Captain,” agreed Richard, saluting sloppily before he jumped down from the tree far too close to James.

“Too right,” nodded James, heading once again for the driver’s seat.

“Captain Slow,” whispered Jeremy, bending down to speak into Richard’s ear. “Oy, Captain, my turn to drive, let’s hurry this along a bit.”

“Be my guest,” said James, stepping back to allow Jeremy access.

*********

“James, Richard?” said Jeremy, panting a little as he’d just crested a small hill with both other boys sat on the back.

“Yeah?” replied James.

“Where are we?”

James perked up, his half dozing boredom interrupted by the promise of another pending disaster. “Err.”

Jeremy had a point. They were quite high up now, and had a decent view around them, but the road they were on was clearly planning on turning in the wrong direction, and there was no sign of any other road coming to meet it.

“Which way should we be going?” asked Richard.

“West,” responded Jeremy, waving his arm in broadly the right direction after squinting at the sun.

“That’s inconvenient.” Richard hopped down off the car and wandered down the road a little, peering at the hedges on either side of the deserted road. They hadn’t seen any cars all morning.

“I’m sure this will come back round eventually,” said James.

“Yes, eventually, when I’m old enough to need to shave. Face it, James, this is not going to come back round without taking us about 10 miles out of our way.”

They both surveyed their surroundings again, taking in the desolate crests of larger hills nearby, and the seemingly endless farmland. Here, there was almost nothing going on.

“Guys, I think I might have found something!” called Richard, interrupting them.

“What?” Jeremy looked round. “Where’s he gone?”

“Hamster?” called James.

“Here!” A small head appeared from inside the hedge. “I think I’ve found a footpath.”

“Oooooh, that looks perfect for a pedal car,” grumbled James, touching the car as if to apologise to it.

Richard shrugged. “Beggars can’t be choosers, it’s going the right way.”

“We should do it,” added Jeremy, peering through the gap in the hedge. “We might need to lift the car over the hedge though.”

“Yes, because this footpath didn’t have vehicles in mind,” objected James again.

“We can tow the car,” said Jeremy, “we won’t ride it off-road, there’s no need to have a fit. Stop whining and come help me lift it over the hedge.”

Jeremy scrambled through the hedge, holding his arms out, ready to catch the nose of the car, and pushing Richard back through to the other side to help James. Nonetheless, it was several minutes before James conceded to the plan and lifted anything, leaving Jeremy waiting impatiently and yelling insults from the other side of the hedge.

Carefully detaching the passenger seat, James handed it to Richard and sent him through before finally lifting the nose of the car in the air. Even then, and even with Richard returning to help, it was a struggle to get over the hedge, which was easily as tall as Richard and thickly overgrown in places.

“At least it wasn’t spiky,” pointed out Richard, as the three of them collapsed in a heap on the other side of the hedge, the car parked haphazardly alongside them.

“Great, they can put that on my gravestone,” muttered James.

“Don’t be silly, James, now we’re on a proper adventure,” put in Jeremy. “We’re going off-road!”

“Not inside the car,” warned James.

Jeremy looked innocent, “No problem.” He lifted his shirt and removed the belt from his trousers with a flourish, strapping one end of it round the front of the car. “Let’s go!”

Initially, the fields were relatively easy to pass. There were basic grassy fields, a bit of a mud path down the side, and other than odd birds that Jeremy got all excited about, not much in the way of wildlife to get in their way. However, inevitably, eventually the path cut through a field full of cows. The three boys carefully tiptoed across the cattle grid and into the field, their confidence growing as the cows paid them no mind.

Then, one of the cows decided that Richard, who was bringing up the rear, looked interesting, and started to follow him.

“Jeremy! The cows want to eat me!” yelled Richard, sprinting past James and Jeremy in an effort to escape the cows.

“Don’t be stupid, cows only eat grass,” retorted Jeremy.

“There are stories of people getting trampled on by cows,” put in James, hustling to catch up with Jeremy, “but typically when they’re out walking the dog, or something otherwise threatening to the cows.”

“They think the car’s a dog!” yelled Richard, running further ahead, only to discover that the exit at the other end of the field was a stile. “Hurry up, we’ve got to lift the car!”

The cows genuinely did look like they had it in for James and Jeremy, with a few cows starting to flank them as they headed for the far corner of the field.

“Don’t tell Richard,” admitted Jeremy to James, “but they are actually starting to worry me.”

“Yeah,” agreed James. “Let’s just hurry this up a little bit. You lift the front, and I’ll grab the back.”

The two older boys reached the stile in record time and, unlike before, with a little precarious balancing, got the car over the stile easily, leaving the cows to stare at them from the other side.

“Honestly, Hamster, who would be scared of a cow? They’re vegetablists! They’re guaranteed not to eat you,” mocked Jeremy.

“I think you’ll find they’re a lot bigger than me and more than capable of squashing me if they feel like it.”

“Everything’s a lot bigger….” began Jeremy.

“…Oh cock,” interrupted James.

“What?”

“I trod in a cow pat.”

The sight of James attempting to scrape off his entire right shoe had Jeremy and Richard doubled up with laughter. Jeremy actually had tears streaming down his face, and every time Richard stopped laughing, a glance at either of the others would set him off again. Somehow, it made the cows seem a whole lot less scary.

The new field sloped downhill quite severely, forcing Jeremy to rely on Richard as a kind of anchor at the back to prevent the car getting away from him, the car jolting and pulling with every bump as they staggered down the hill. Ahead of them, just as it began to flatten out a little, and head under a small cluster of trees at the corner of the field, Jeremy realised that there was more to the exit to this field than a simple gap in the hedge.

This field finished with a stream, and a set of stepping stones.

They reached the bank of the stream without incident, and paused to survey the crossing for a moment.

“I think we might have to carry the car again,” said Jeremy.

“Well it’s that or wait a week for the seat to dry out if we take it through the water,” pointed out James, moving into position at the back of the car.

“Right then,” nodded Jeremy. “Let’s go! Hamster, you follow James.”

“Wait a minute, you halfwit. If we’re carrying something across a set of stepping stones, we need to know when we’re going to step, you can’t just charge off and expect me to keep up with you, I’ll fall in.”

“Really?” Jeremy stuck his bottom lip out, but he did as James asked, waiting until James told him to step before he took each stone.

For the most part, it was reasonably smooth sailing. The stones were wobbly, and a few of them were slightly below the water and slippery, but the two boys had good balance, and managed to keep their nerve. The worst part was in the middle, where one stone had disappeared completely, so there was a large, uneven gap that they had to manage to synchronise. James ended up with a shoe in the water, but as it was the one he’d been trying to clean, he decided he didn’t mind one wet foot, and chose to ignore it.

Finally, they reached the other side safely, and placing the car on the ground once more in order to admire the new gravel track on the other side, they sank to the ground to wait for Richard.

Richard was quite enjoying himself on the stepping stones. With nothing he needed to carry, he was happily hopping from one to the other, occasionally grabbing onto low hanging tree branches and pretending to be Tarzan. Then he came to the big gap.

It was too far for him to jump. Jeremy and James had managed it fine, but it was obvious as soon as Richard reached it that that wasn’t going to work. Shrugging, figuring there must be another way to reach that stone, Richard reached for another low hanging tree branch, testing its strength as he prepared to actually put his weight on it.

It seemed fine, taking a deep breath and trying to ignore the other two boys watching in fascination, Richard took a jump and swung.

Right into the middle of the river.

And dropped.

The water was waist deep on Richard anyway, but with the added momentum of the tree swing, he managed a kind of back flop, smacking the water with the entire length of his body in one go and instantly submerging.

On the bank, James snorted, then they both burst into peals of laughter.

In the water, Richard floundered for a moment, struggling to find his feet and the bottom of the stream, then all of a sudden he succeeded and his head burst back out of the water. Just in time to see his friends falling about laughing.

“Oooh, that’s cold.” Richard waded through the stream, convinced that getting back onto the remaining stepping stones would only make things worse, then finally arrived on the bank and the other side, his trainers squelching loudly as he walked.

For Jeremy and James, who had just about managed to stop laughing as he waded through the water, the squelching and dripping was enough to set them off all over again.

Richard stood and glared at them, waiting for them to stop whilst trying not to shiver too violently. Or sneeze.

“Aaaaaccccchhhhoooo.” He failed.

James, still chuckling slightly, looked at him, assessing. “Actually, it’s not that warm today, Richard. Sunny, but still only May. You’re going to have to take those clothes off to dry.”

“No, I’m not,” said Richard, quite clearly. “I don’t have any other clothes with me.”

“I know, but you’re going to freeze. Here, Jez has a spare sweater, you can wear that.” James reached into the car seat, revealing the makeshift cushion they’d been using that morning.

Richard eyed him sceptically, well aware of just how ridiculous that idea was, but then a bout of shivering overtook him again, encouraging him to get on with it. James, being the responsible adult for a few minutes, wrung out Richard’s clothes and placed them carefully across the car to dry, only turning back to Richard when Jeremy erupted in the giggles. Again.

“Hamster,” spluttered Jeremy, pointing mainly at Richard’s arms. “You look completely ridiculous.”

“Don’t worry,” grumbled Richard, “I feel completely ridiculous too. Can anyone find my hands?”

Still laughing, Jeremy and James took an arm each, rolling the sleeves up until they could finally see his hands. “There,” said James, “Now you’ve got a perfectly functional dress.”

Richard looked down, well aware that the sweater fully reached his knees.

“Don’t worry about it, man. At least it’s keeping you warm.”

Jeremy, though still cracking the occasional helpless smirk, turned his attention elsewhere – the road surface. “Do you think this is pedal car friendly, oh master of the engineering?” he asked James.

“Yeah,” said James, apparently past caring for now. “Let’s give it a try.”

Jeremy lifted himself back into the driver’s seat, then waited for the others to mount, chuckling as he heard Richard says to James, “And no looking up my dress!”

*********

It was nice to be back on roads again. After all the cross country stuff, roads suddenly seemed faster and more exciting, even the slow slogs up hills, though increasingly they were all getting off and pushing up the bigger hills, just to save time. Still, despite the increased pace, reasonable amount of tarmac, and a very amusing sign pointing to ‘Moor Cock’, by the time it began to turn dark, there was no sign of any village.

As James put it – there were no old ladies available to charm.

Finally, as Jeremy was forced to break out his keyring torch just to see the road under the front wheels, they were forced to admit that they’d need to camp in one of the fields. Spying a gate that was close to a set of trees, Richard clambered over the gate and attempted to investigate the trees by the light of the newly risen Moon, leaving Jeremy and James to haul the car over.

“I think I can make us a shelter,” he called to the others, waving an armful of lengthy fallen tree branches. “I did this for a badge in the cubs a few weeks ago.”

“Yes, Hamster, make us a den,” ordered Jeremy, waving his arm authoritatively, and pointing his torch in a vaguely helpful direction as he sank to the ground.

“Chuffing heck,” moaned James, sinking to the ground beside him. “That is really a lot of mileage on not a lot of fuel.”

Jeremy laughed, “Best fuel efficiency ever! It’ll be perfect for the eco-mentalists.”

“Here,” grinned James, reaching into Richard’s soaking wet sweater and extracting two apples. “A little bruised and soggy, but I’m sure they’ll be fine.”

Jeremy nodded, immediately taking a bite of his apple.

It took a little while, but eventually a grinning Richard emerged from the trees, half a hedge sticking out of his hair and Jeremy’s sweater distinctly dirtier than it had been. “I’ve done it, come take a look.”

He led the older boys deeper into the trees, revealing a vast array of longer branches leaning up against a fallen tree trunk. “Look,” he said, moving round to one end and gesturing underneath the branches, where apparently he’d been digging out some of the ground to make more room.

“It’s not very big,” said Jeremy.

“It’s not supposed to be big, we don’t need a full kitchen and bathroom, we’re just looking to sleep for the night.”

“I mean I don’t think we’ll all fit,” observed Jeremy. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I take up more room than you.”

Richard sighed. “It’s probably best you get in first anyway, you can call it a trial.”

“Feet first?”

“Ideally. It’s probably a bit claustrophobic at the other end.”

“Wish me luck, James,” pouted Jeremy, sitting down and slowly sliding into the den feet first.

“Good luck,” said James cheerily, turning to Richard. “Me next, or you?”

“Maybe he needs to be in the middle, so it doesn’t matter too much,” shrugged Richard.

James nodded. “Right, watch out Jezza, I’m coming in!”

“Where? Where is he supposed to fit, Richard! Are you making me sleep right next to him? He snores you know!” Jeremy waved his torch around in the shelter for effect, illuminating the shadows of James shuffling past him all over the branches.

“Jez, you have to sleep close together when you’re outside or you’ll freeze!” protested Richard.

“Well don’t expect me to be in any fit state for pedalling tomorrow!”

“Safer for us then, you great oaf,” came James’s muffled voice.

Richard took a quick look around in the moonlight, checking the car more than anything, then announced, “I’m coming in!” Before he too shuffled into the shelter, accompanied by groans from the others.

*********

Jeremy was the first to wake in the morning. He was a little sore from lying in the same position all night, but considering he’d spend the night on the ground outdoors without even his sweater on, he was feeling pretty good. He hadn’t been woken up by James’s snoring, he hadn’t been cold and he wasn’t particularly uncomfortable even now. He looked down at his two friends.

James was laying with his back to him, his arms lifted as though protecting his head, and a light snore erupting from his lips. Hamster was using Jeremy’s shoulder as a pillow, lying on his side facing him, his left arm curled up near his mouth. They looked very peaceful, and for a few minutes Jeremy remained still, resisting movement until finally the protests of his bladder became more urgent.

The others shifted as he moved, and a few sleepy protests emerged, but neither of them awoke fully and Jeremy took the opportunity to take some time to himself – sitting on the passenger seat of the little car as he took in their stunning location in the daylight.

Still, Jeremy’s patience wasn’t infinite, and as much as he’d been enjoying their adventure, he wasn’t keen on spending another night in the open. Once he’d had a quick drink of, very flat, lemonade, he returned to the shelter to wake the others up.

Once they were going, James in the driver’s seat, and Richard at least partially in his own clothes, it became clear that they’d only been a tiny bit short of the next village the night before. Somehow, given how busy it was, it was rather difficult to believe they hadn’t known it was there!

Wray village was heaving. Everywhere they went there were people, cars and, strangely, scarecrows. Eventually giving up on pedalling round the place as a bad job, they drove the car to a car park and walked through the village, hoping to find something that might work as breakfast. Eventually, they settled on ice cream.

“Chaps,” said James over a mint choc chip, “I think I have a cunning plan.”

“Do tell,” grinned Richard, his expression accentuated by a magnificent chocolate moustache.

“Thank you, I will,” nodded James, checking that Jeremy was paying attention. “Obviously, this place is full of visitors. It’s a bank holiday, they’re having a bit of a celebration.”

“With freaky scarecrows,” added Richard.

“Yeah. So, there are people from outside the village visiting today, lots of them. And the nearest big place from here is Lancaster.”

“Nice,” said Richard, nodding.

“Is it time for this face?” asked Jeremy, revealing a pout that was even more spectacular than the day before.

“Definitely not,” said James.

“How are we going to find these people?” asked Richard. “Most of them don’t go round shouting, ‘I’m from Lancaster’ all day.”

“In,” James paused, “the car park.”

“Sorry, what?” spluttered Richard.

“Of course,” said Jeremy, leaning back in his chair with his large, blue ice cream. “We check out the cars, most cars have local parking permits and stuff like that, we look for the ones that belong in Lancaster.”

“It’s a plan,” said James. “Of course, it’s possible that there won’t be space for all of us in one car. We might have to split up.” James reached for a napkin and pulled a tiny pen out of some sort of pocket knife he was carrying. “This is my Auntie’s address.” He handed it to Jeremy.

“What about me?” asked Richard.

“You stay with Jezza, we won’t need to split up that much. If we don’t all fit in the first car, I’ll go and warn my Auntie first, then you two catch me up, OK?”

Richard looked a bit sceptical, but he acquiesced.

“You sure you don’t want me to follow on solo?” Jeremy asked.

“You’ll need the secret weapon,” grinned James, catching Jeremy’s eye and glancing down at Richard.

“Ah, of course,” nodded Jeremy gravely, still not completely convinced James was right about his begging face.

“What about our car?” asked Richard.

“We might have to hide it and come back for it later. My parents have a van, if they come to fetch me in that, it ought to fit.”

“So a van from Lancaster would be really handy?”

“True,” nodded James, glancing round the car park.

“I’ll start that end,” grinned Richard, heading over to the car park entrance.

It took a while to make it all the way round the car park, it was busy new cars kept arriving and leaving, but finally, just as it began to rain, James spotted a family headed back to their Lancaster bound car.

“Hamster!” he yelled, “Come here!”

“Yeah?” Richard appeared right next to him, astonishingly quickly.

“I need you to come with me,” said James, pointing at the group of people getting into their car. “Just stay quiet and look cold and tired.”

Richard looked at him a bit quizzically, but didn’t comment further as James dragged him over to the departing car.

“Peugeot, nice,” he muttered.

“Shhh,” hissed James. “You’re worse than the oaf!”

“Excuse me,” James addressed the Peugeot’s driver. “I wonder if you have space for any extra people? We’re trying to get back to Lancaster, you see.”

The driver looked up at the two boys, and back at his car. “I don’t think we’ve got space for both of you!”

“If you could give even one of us a ride…” began James.

“Wait!” Jeremy bellowed from the other side of the car park. “I think this guy might take all of us!”

“Ah, excuse me, perhaps we’ve found something that can take all of us,” James backed up, leaving the relieved driver staring after him.

Richard ran over to Jeremy, who was pointing at a bright red Zafira in a kind of eager disgust.

“Excuse me while I swallow my pride,” said James, walking over to the driver and frantically nodding to Richard to follow him.

“Hello,” he said.

“Hi there,” replied the driver, who at least seemed reasonably friendly.

“We wondered if you were heading for Lancaster, and if you had any extra space going?”

“How many of you?” asked the driver.

“Just three,” said Jeremy, feeling he was on reasonably safe ground for speaking without James yelling at him.

“How did you end up here on your own?” The driver looked baffled. “I didn’t know there were buses.”

“Ah, well no, that’s rather a long story I’m afraid,” replied James wryly, “One I am completely willing to explain on the way to Lancaster, but perhaps not in the rain in the car park. Let’s just say it involves an incident with a pedal car and a train.”

The driver laughed. “That sounds suitably entertaining anyway! You’re in luck actually, I’m dropping my family off, so I’ve got space for several. In fact if you squeeze in a bit,” he glanced at Jeremy, “I might even stretch to a pedal car. But not a train.” He paused. “Unless it’s a toy train.”

James smiled politely. “No trains, I’d be ecstatic to bring the pedal car though.”

“OK, I get to see the pedal car, and you tell me a story on the way home, you’ve got a lift to Lancaster.” He held out his hand to James, shaking hands with the boy. “I’m Ollie, by the way.”

“James. The little one is Richard, and the big one’s Jeremy.”

“Hi all,” smiled Ollie. “Let’s get this pedal car and then we’ll get going.”

Packing the pedal car into the Zafira was tricky, but with various extras removed it went in. James took the front, with Jeremy behind him and Richard right at the back behind him and the rest of the cars many seats folded down. Ollie was good company. Relatively young, with kids younger than any of the boys, and enthusiastic about their adventures on their pedal car. He made them appreciate the adventure they’d been on. All too soon though, it was time to face James’s Aunt.

Back to reality.

When Ollie dropped them off, they waved him off, then paused for a moment. Just the three of them, appreciating the amazing adventure they’d had. And how much fun it’d been.

Them, and the pedal car.

James reached out to pat it, one last moment with it too, before knocking on his Aunt’s door.

The car collapsed, every single piece of it landing in a heap on the pavement.

“Cock,” said James. “I was going to get a couple of sensibly sized drivers – with Stiggy – for the next race with that.”

“Whatever happened to Stiggy?” asked Richard.

*********

It was strange being back at school, and at home. Following the rules after all that time solo. Richard wandered through the playground on the way into school, his Mum watching him from the gate and throngs of kids milling around him, all excited about the long weekend and what they’d been up to. He had friends in the crowd, it wasn’t so bad, but still – this weekend had been amazing and no one would appreciate it.

Then he felt a hand tap his shoulder.

“Oy, Hamster,” said James, Jeremy standing alongside him. “Look at this.”

James held out a newspaper, folded so that a particular photo could be seen on the front.

The headline read, ‘Local school pupil wins pedal car race.’

“That’s Stiggy!” exclaimed Richard. “How did he do that?”


End file.
